After visiting this site, your life will never quite be the same.
That’s because the things that have already happened to you are in the past, and the things that haven’t happened to you yet haven’t happened to you yet, because they are in the future. That’s how time works.
However if you are living every day in exactly the same way as you always have been, then you probably have some sort of major psychological disorder. That being the case, we recommend that you stop reading this page immediately and seek out some professional medical advice.
If you have absolutely no intention of living your life in exactly the same way from hereon in, then the original premise stands, and you are perfectly safe to carry on reading this website.
Phew, that’s a relief!
That being said, if you changed your mind about living your life in exactly the same way everyday as a result of reading this website, you’re not be out of the woods yet. You may still have an underlying psychological problem. But to be perfectly honest, we don’t care that much, as we’ve done our bit. Well done us!
We are Forbidden Helmet Productions, and this site is the home of all of the creative-type stuff that we do, including:
- Sketch Comedy (Alien Fudge & Guild of the Forbidden Helmet)
- Sitcoms (Guild of the Forbidden Helmet & John Inverness)
- Performance Poetry (AYM & John Inverness)
- Satire (Vake News)
- Screen plays (The Don & The Mindpool)
- Stage plays (The Everyman Theologies & A Phoebe Waller-Bridge Sized Hole In My Life)
- Children’s fiction (The Clownmaster Chronicles)
- Music (Inner City Sumo, Project Lockdown)
Take a look around and let us know what you think. And then, if you need to, go and seek professional medical advice.
p.s. We would like to remind the patrons of this site to look around at their own risk. We will not be held liable for any psychological damage caused to individuals whilst on this site. Plus, we are also not responsible for any loss or damage to personal property that may occur whilst you’re on this site, just because you weren’t paying enough attention to what you were doing. That’s just your stupid fault, you idiot!
Thank you for your kind patronage & enjoy!